It was the day I decided to quit Photography that I realized I not only truly loved it, but I needed it.
I had decided I couldn't be better, that I didn't want to put the effort into learning new things nor perfecting the very skill I posessed. I didn't have faith within myself to pull it off. When people would let me know how amazing a certain image I took was, I wouldn't take pride in it. I would just say Thank You and not a word more. I didn't want to boast about my photography or put a 'price' on it because I felt it was sacred to me and if someone, anyone was to ridicule it, I would be petrified. I had decided that I'd rather not deal with the bad that may come so I quit. Just.like.that.
I stopped taking pictures, I stopped putting thought into my images when I would take them, I just stopped. And after awhile I didn't feel anything, nothing wrong that I had quit. Everything was still normal, I didn't feel any turmoil that I had expected. I didn't feel anything. Until I realized that I didn't feel anything. No inspiration, no love for what I did, no gratification. I decided then this was worth more. Feeling the camera in my hands, loving the joy I brought to clients faces, the overwhelming response of gratitude when I showcased their albums. This was it. I was home. And I was never going to leave again.